God calls home one of his soldiers

It's been a rough couple of days. My grandfather passed away Thursday at lunch time. There are other stressors happening as well, which is not making it any easier to get through this. Tomorrow we have a Veteran's service to attend, and then the regular service on Monday. So I am focusing on arranging childcare for those times, which is proving to be more difficult than I had hoped. But at least I do not have to worry about also losing a day of work, since Monday is Little Man's day off anyway.
And then, just when I think I have the emotion under control...Cam will ask a question about cancer, or say something like "this baby will never get to meet Grampy Gabe" and completely throw me. I know it's just his way of processing it, but he has a gift for blind-siding me with these questions and it is very hard to keep the emotion in check long enough to respond.
Phil has been great, fielding most of the tough questions and just being there when I find it too hard and start to cry. I have such a supportive husband. When I got the news I called him at work to let him know and right away he asked if I needed him to come home right away. I said no, and when he did come home after his shift he brought me roses, chocolate and Dill Pickle flavoured pumpkin seeds. He was offered an extra shift for the next day, but turned it down so he could be home with me. So he's been really really great.
I am exhausted, I don't think I have really slept since he went into the hospital. But at least I did get to see him, he woke from his coma last saturday as arrived to visit, so I got say some things to him (not much as I was trying desperately not to bawl). And as much as I try to comfort myself with "at least he's not in pain anymore" and "he's not sick now" and "he led a very long and happy life"....it does not change that I wish he had never gotten sick in the first place and that I always thought he would be there and now he's just...not.
He was a veteran, very proud to have served his country. He was loud and opininated, seemed to enjoy a good debate. He cared for us grandchildren, he doted on his great-grandchildren. He loved my grandmother. He will be missed.